Brian Haldane, Sunny Weathers, and Jeremy White get caught up on former LSU basketball great Vernel “Asante Stone” Singleton’s adult entertainment career and termination-related stories.
Read More »H&R Block Offers Tax Advice for Professional Protesters
H&R Block has launched an outreach program with complimentary advice tailored toward the tens of thousands of individuals who are purportedly being paid handsomely by liberal sugar daddies.
Read More »Kellyanne Conway: “The Press Refuses to Cover That Thing I Just Made Up”
The counselor to the president of the United States excoriated the media for not reporting on something she had concocted in her mind only moments earlier.
Read More »Young Mother Upset Facebook Feed Constantly Reminding Her She Brought Child Into Burgeoning Dystopia
A first-time mother would like her Facebook friends to stop filling her feed with posts indicating she chose to have a child on the eve of America unraveling into a dystopian nightmare.
Read More »ESPN: Islamic State Secures Top Recruiting Class
Upstart Islamic State has managed to secure this year’s most talented recruiting class, thanks in large part to President Donald Trump, according to ESPN.
Read More »Trump Strategist Steve Bannon: “The Press Needs to Shut Up, Blow Me, and Make Me a Sandwich”
The American press should be quiet, fellate Steve Bannon, and prepare him a tasty sandwich, President Donald Trump’s chief strategist told The New York Times.
Read More »We Shall Overcomb: Trump’s Hair Belies Lies
Donald Trump's hair is merely a metaphor for his rhetoric.
Read More »NFL Scraps Instant Replay: “Indisputable Video Evidence No Longer Exists in Trump’s America”
Citing Sean Spicer's first press briefing, league officials claimed the standard upon which the instant replay system is based is now an obsolete notion.
Read More »