Tag Archives: Health

Former LSU starting quarterback Danny Etling is continuing to whelm his fan base by testing positive for several performance-averaging substances.

Congressman Garrret Graves insists he has undergone no more than two lobotomies to maintain his unconditional fealty to President Donald Trump.

Eleanor Bunson hates conflict, which is why whenever a colleague expresses adoration for President Donald Trump, she pretends he's her feeble-minded grandfather.

President Donald Trump announced that his administration soon will begin exhuming and deporting the remains of every foreign-born person buried in Arlington National Cemetery.

"Every one of your allegations are correct" Graves replied to questions regarding an Off the Wire report asserting he exchanged his backbone for $50, which he used to buy alcohol, while attending the University of Alabama.

Congressman Steve Scalise is working overtime to convince fellow Republicans that his blood is uncorrupted by empathy potentially contracted through a score of blood transfusions after he was shot in the hip in 2017.

Congressman Garret Graves sold his backbone in exchange for $50 he used to buy alcohol while attending the University of Alabama in the early 1990s.

Tenured weatherman and local cool guy Pat Shingleton has announced that he will retire from his post as WBRZ's chief forecaster at the end of the month.