Sen. Bill Cassidy received a software upgrade designed to ensure his ongoing, unconditional support of President Donald Trump, according to Cassidy's office.
Read More »Sen. Kennedy Calls on Gov. Edwards to Resign for Dismissing Urgent Warnings of Russian Election Meddling
Gov. John Bel Edwards should immediately resign for failing to fulfill the oath of office of president of the United States, according to Sen. John Kennedy.
Read More »Graves Denies Having Third Lobotomy to Remain Blindly Loyal to Trump
Congressman Garrret Graves insists he has undergone no more than two lobotomies to maintain his unconditional fealty to President Donald Trump.
Read More »Sen. Kennedy: I Went to Russia “on a Super-important, Super-secret Mission”
Sen. John Kennedy revealed to reporters that he spent Independence Day in Moscow as a covert operative of an agency he's not at liberty to disclose.
Read More »VIDEO: Rep. Garret Graves Confirms He Sold Spine in College for Beer Money
"Every one of your allegations are correct" Graves replied to questions regarding an Off the Wire report asserting he exchanged his backbone for $50, which he used to buy alcohol, while attending the University of Alabama.
Read More »Scalise Trying Hard to Prove He Remains Empathy-free, Untainted by Blood From Donors With Souls
Congressman Steve Scalise is working overtime to convince fellow Republicans that his blood is uncorrupted by empathy potentially contracted through a score of blood transfusions after he was shot in the hip in 2017.
Read More »Majority of Republicans OK With Trump Using Babies as Human Shields
A new Quinnipiac University national poll revealed an overwhelming majority of Republicans would still support President Donald Trump if he placed small children between himself and a would-be assassin’s bullet.
Read More »Poor, Sick Conservative Willing to Die for GOP’s Right to Kill Millions
A financially strapped, dialysis-dependent supporter of President Donald Trump said he would gladly give up his life in defense of Republican efforts to kill countless Americans as part of their overhaul of the country’s health care system.
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