Off the Wire

A longtime friend and adviser to Donald Trump claims the president’s approval ratings are ailing as a result of being poisoned with a radioactive element best known for its use in political assassinations carried out by Russian agents.

Jeff Landry announced his office plans to use the powers invested in him by the state’s four-decade-old constitution to eliminate the state’s growing crisis of opioid drug abuse.

Injury attorney and serial television commercial participant Spencer Calahan is offering a four-week retreat for anyone seeking to learn the basics of catching various sporting accessories while talking to a camera, with any leftover time to be used to discuss the business of being a lawyer.

A Livingston Parish man is in custody after police received a tip he was producing extremely volatile N-bombs in and around his home, according to Louisiana State Police.

When the NFL's Raiders begin playing in their new Sin City stadium, it will feature a half-dozen luxury suites where fans can enjoy the company of prostitutes during games.

He might lie to other people, but that’s because he doesn’t love them like he loves me.

Speaker of the House Paul Ryan has introduced a revised version of his proposed American Health Care Act that would eliminate coverage for anyone who frequents Taco Bell.

Multiple sources confirm Trump is the subject of a highly classified program aimed at weaponizing the former model’s famously piercing glare.