Phrase “Domestic Tranquility” Disappears From U.S. Constitution

Federal authorities are asking for the public’s help in tracking down the phrase “domestic Tranquility” after discovering it’s no longer in the preamble of the U.S. Constitution.

The Federal Bureau of Investigations says staffers at the National Archives noticed this past weekend that the phrase had disappeared from the founding document representing the supreme law of the land.

“Archivists were performing a routine inspection of the U.S. Constitution when they noticed the opening sentence was missing the words ‘domestic Tranquility,'” FBI spokesman Dave Fitz explained. “Officials at the National Archives are asking anyone with knowledge regarding the location of the phrase to please contact the FBI immediately.”

“The pair of words somehow disappeared on their own and have gone into hiding.”

Since the U.S. Constitution was first drafted in 1787, the preamble read, “We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.”

Currently, there’s a blank space after the word “insure,” where the phrase “domestic Tranquility” had famously resided for over 230 years, according to Fitz.

“Given there were no signs of foul play, we can only assume the pair of words somehow disappeared on their own and have gone into hiding,” Fitz said. “As it stands, we have no leads on the phrase’s whereabouts, but we’re hopeful concerned citizens will remain vigilant to help bring domestic Tranquility back to our nation’s capital.”

About Tony Swartz

Tony Swartz
Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

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