White House: “Hail to the Chief” Replaced With Cry of “Leeroy Jenkins”

The Trump administration has announced that the official presidential anthem of the United States has been replaced with the battle cry of a popular character from the video game World of Warcraft.

A statement released by the White House explained “Hail to the Chief” no longer will be played to accompany President Donald Trump’s appearance at public events. Instead, event attendees, guests, and honorees will holler the eponymous, stylized war whoop of Leeroy Jenkins in unison.

The distinctive, elongated yell of “Leeroyyyyyyyy … Yennnkins” was made famous by a viral internet video featuring a group of WoW players discussing detailed battle strategy for a risky plan specifically to aid Jenkins. The discussion is abruptly ended when Jenkins — who was away from his computer preparing a meal, and unaware of their plans — charges headlong into battle, shouting his name, prompting the other players to rush in to save him, only for the entire lot to be massacred within seconds.

“We believe it perfectly embodies this president’s administration.”

“The cry of Leeroy Jenkins is an anthem synonymous with irrepressible cluelessness and impulsiveness that ultimately leads to the destruction of allies who are desperately and futilely trying to help save a complete dumbass from his own stupidity,” the statement reads. “We believe it perfectly embodies this president’s administration.”

Jenkins’ infamous call to arms will be employed in instances where “Hail to the Chief” normally would have been played for previous presidents, the statement explains. The four ruffles and flourishes that traditionally precede “Hail to the Chief” (when it’s played for the U.S. president) still will be played to cue the crowd when to utter the hubristic war cry.

When President Trump was asked by a reporter about the anthem change, the notorious fan of Kentucky Fried Chicken replied, “At least I have chicken.”

 

About Tony Swartz

Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

Check Also

Cortana Mall to Be Taken Off Life Support

Doctors at Our Lady of Lake Hospital sadly report a former major shopping venue will soon be taken off life support.