Infowars Launches Sports Section for Conspiracy-Minded LSU Fans

Off the WireThe website of America’s most notable conspiracy theorist is now featuring content geared at catering to LSU football fans who believe the Southeastern Conference is out to get them and their team.

Branching out from purported “false flags” to “false yellow flags,” Alex Jones’ website Infowars has launched a section dedicated to discussing conspiracy theories involving the Tigers, the SEC, and LSU’s rivals, especially Alabama and its head coach, Nick Saban.

Nick Saban is watching you, according to Alex Jones.
Nick Saban is watching you, according to Alex Jones.

One recently published article claims the “all-seeing eye” on the back of U.S. currency belongs to Saban, who served as head coach at LSU for four seasons. Another post asserts the Illuminati funnels money from the Federal Reserve — which Jones claims is owned by members of the secret society — on behalf of the SEC to officials calling LSU games to ensure LSU wins only the games the conference wants LSU to win.

Other content contends Saban’s entire coaching career has been orchestrated by mysterious forces that have led him from college football to the NFL and back to the NCAA, all by design. That same entry also alleges Saban was the real master plotter of the attacks on the United States on September 11, 2001.

“Without that 2003 BCS title, Tiger fans wouldn’t be so emotionally consumed by Saban and subject to his devious mind-control tactics.”

“Nick Saban executed 9/11 as part of an initiation rite into the secret society, which later created the opening at the Miami Dolphins to get him away from LSU,” the article asserts. “It was all part of the grand plan to insert him as the leader at Alabama. The puppet masters have been working on this since they first laid eyes on him as a student at Kent State. Wake up, America!”

Guiding Saban to LSU, enabling him to win a single national championship for the Tigers, then ultimately installing him to coach for the “dark overlords” at the SEC was all part of their plot to drive LSU fans utterly mad, the article claims.

“Without that 2003 BCS title,” it states, “Tiger fans wouldn’t be so emotionally consumed by Saban and subject to his devious mind-control tactics.”

Jones and his cadre of writers at Infowars also have put forth the assertion that the SEC’s plants in the government have fluoridated the water supply in order to dull the minds of Americans so as to prevent them from realizing “the truth” about the hidden forces emanating from the conference’s offices in Birmingham.

“Why do you think Bama fans never go anywhere near fluoride?” one contributor asked. “Bad teeth is a small price to pay to not be sheeple.”

In addition to Infowars marketing purple-and-gold tinfoil hats to LSU fans, at least one writer also speculated about the role chemical agents allegedly sprayed by high-flying aircraft may have played in the recent death of the school’s beloved tiger mascot, which died from a rare form of cancer last month.

“Did chemtrails kill Mike the Tiger?” one writer asked about Mike VI’s death. “When was the last time you heard of a tiger dying of a spindle cell sarcoma? The SEC killed Mike because they hate the Tigers and are out to get LSU, folks! That’s why Bama gets all the calls!”RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

 

About Tony Swartz

Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

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