Attorney Gordon McKernan Launches Fleet of Giant Promotional G’s to Hover Over Area Traffic

Off the WireA Baton Rouge personal injury lawyer known for extensively advertising his firm has created an innovative way to obnoxiously shove his logo into the faces of thousands of commuters.

Attorney Gordon McKernan has deployed nearly a dozen 20-foot-tall aluminum G’s to hover about 30 feet above the area’s major roadways — including Interstates 10, 12, and 110, and Airline Highway — during peak traffic hours.

McKernan’s signature Century Modern font G’s each will be kept aloft with unmanned aerial vehicles, making him a pioneer in the field of drone-powered marketing.

The 47-year-old lawyer said he came up with the idea to launch an armada of giant airborne logos after realizing he had exhausted every conventional means of advertising his law firm.

“After leasing every available billboard, buying every available daytime TV spot, and installing a giant LED sign along I-10 next to my giant-G-adorned office building, I knew I had to think outside the box to increase the size of my marketing footprint.”

“I’m a strong believer in brand awareness, so I’m constantly looking at new ways to make people sick of seeing my ads,” McKernan explained. “But after leasing every available billboard, buying every available daytime TV spot, and installing a giant LED sign along I-10 next to my giant-G-adorned office building, I knew I had to think outside the box to increase the size of my marketing footprint.”

Gordon-McKernan-cover-image
Attorney Gordon McKernan’s ubiquitous face, logo, and slogan.

The hovering G’s will be operated remotely by trained drone pilots stationed in McKernan’s offices, according to the man known for the slogan “Get Gordon! Get It Done!” After an initial startup cost of approximately $50,000, McKernan estimates the new form of advertising to run about $250,000 annually, an investment he believes will return huge dividends.

“When people see that capital serif G, they think Gordon, and they’ll be thinking Gordon a lot more with these new hovering monogram logos,” McKernan beamed.

As for the potential issues such obtrusive advertising over busy thoroughfares might cause, McKernan sees no downside.

“Will some people get distracted by a giant metal G floating right above the road? I hope so! Why else am I spending all this money?” McKernan posited. “And if people get injured in an accident that occurred because a driver was distracted by the hovering G’s, guess what personal injury attorney will likely be in the forefront of their minds. It’s a win-win situation.”RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Tony Swartz

Tony Swartz
Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

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