CBS’ “NCIS” Wins West Virginia Republican Primary

Off the WireIn a surprise upset, supporters of Donald Trump have overwhelmingly made the CBS TV show NCIS the winner of tonight’s West Virginia Republican presidential primary.

Despite the presumptive GOP nominee telling his supporters at a recent rally not to bother voting in the primary since he was the last remaining Republican candidate in the race, many confused voters still went to the polls and apparently decided to write in their votes for the only thing they love as much as Trump.

“I like it when that goth bitch says smart words. Really makes you think, you know?” Dan “The Man” Mansfield explained as he exited a polling place, donning a “Make America Great Again” hat, in Wheeling, WV.

It seems a majority of those who showed up to the polls agreed.

CNN also has already predicted NCIS will win nearly 90% of the Republican delegates still up for grabs in the remaining primaries before the party’s convention.

So far, Republican officials have yet to comment on the results, although inside sources claim GOP leaders will take anything they can get in regard to blocking Donald Trump from gaining the party’s nomination in July.

CNN also has already predicted NCIS will win nearly 90% of the Republican delegates still up for grabs in the remaining primaries before the party’s convention. If the projection holds true, Trump would not reach the 1,237 mark needed to secure the nomination, thus likely bringing about the contested convention many in the GOP had been hoping for.

Meanwhile, The Big Bang Theory has officially become the Democratic Party nominee.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Evan Rabalais

Evan Rabalais
Evan Rabalais is a standup comedian from Baton Rouge, LA. He also knows how to read and write, which his parents are more proud of.

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