MARCH MADNESS: Foxes vs. Jocks(es) – Day 9

We kick off Round 2 with a couple of pairings featuring a pageant queen, a porn star, and two of the most notorious postseason underachievers in the history of professional sports. (For Day 8’s results, click here.)

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FOXES: Ali Landry (1) vs. Lexi Belle (8)
Top-seeded Ali Landry made it out of the opening round by defeating No. 16 seed Kitty Carlisle with 61% of the vote, while No. 8 seed Lexi Belle blew away ninth-seeded Denise Boutte with 90%. Landry is a former Miss USA from Breaux Bridge who’s perhaps best known for a Doritos Super Bowl ad. Independence native Belle is a world-renowned porn star who’s game for doing just about anything on camera. In other words, one’s known for putting chips in her mouth; the other is known for putting all sorts of things in her mouth … and other bodily orifices. Today, you decide which will prevail: pageantry or perversion.

One’s known for putting chips in her mouth; the other is known for putting all sorts of things in her mouth … and other bodily orifices.

JOCKS(es): Peyton Manning (1) vs. Karl Malone (8)
No. 1 seed Peyton Manning made it to Round 2 by defeating Clyde “The Glide” Drexler by a margin of nearly 2-to-1, and eighth-seeded Karl Malone crushed Lou Brock with 90% of the vote. Both are considered by many to be the best players ever to compete professionally at their respective positions (NFL quarterback and NBA power forward), and both have extensive postseason experience. And between the two of them, they have a grand total of one professional championship ring (cue sad trombone).

Ready. Set. VOTE! (Polls close nightly at 10 p.m. CDT.)

 

FYI: If you’re trying to figure out our brotastic competition, here’s an explanation.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Editorial Staff

Editorial Staff
A random collection of overqualified, underachieving smartasses.

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