GUEST COLUMN: This Jindal Kid Is a Goddam Idiot – Richard Nixon’s Ghost

Off the Wire

Just who the hell does this pissant governor from Louisiana think he is, going around blabbering about Cuba like people actually give a rat’s ass what he has to say about foreign policy?

Notice I said “say” and not “think,” because if he had actually thought about the issue of normalizing relations with Cuba, he wouldn’t have said the things he did. Instead, I’m sure he just mindlessly regurgitated what someone else said that he and his imbecilic advisers thought sounded like it might help him fulfill his hopeless fantasy of being elected president.

Just like all the other short-sighted, memory-impaired mental midgets critical of the president’s decision, he apparently forgot that arguably my greatest achievement – the hallmark of what I’d like to be my legacy – was normalizing relations with China.

Why else would this political troglodyte say about Obama’s new Cuba policy that “the president is appeasing a communist dictatorship headed by the Castro brothers that takes political prisoners and completely disregards basic human dignity,” and that “taking steps to normalize relations with Cuba only serves to reward them, and it is a disservice to those in Cuba who wish to be free and who live in fear of a dictatorial regime”?

What the hell does he think of me and what I did during those eight days in 1972 in China with Chairman Mao in the midst of the goddam Cold War?

If he thinks Obama is ruining America’s standing in the world by reestablishing diplomatic ties and economic trade with Cuba 23 years after the fall of the Soviet Union, what the hell does he think of me and what I did during those eight days in 1972 in China with Chairman Mao in the midst of the goddam Cold War?

Maybe the ungrateful bastard should take his iPhone, the Christmas toys he bought for his children, and everything else he’s got that was made in China and give them to somebody who appreciates what the hell I did for this nation and the world!

richard_nixon_fidel_castroSo he’s worried about “appeasing a communist dictator … that takes political prisoners and completely disregards basic human dignity,” is he?

First of all, I’m more alive than Fidel Castro. Secondly, this communist he’s so damn worried about appeasing is an Eagle Scout compared to Mao!

He wants to take the president to task for reestablishing diplomatic ties with an island nation 90 miles away from our shores because Castro took political prisoners and killed people who were a threat to his reign?

Here’s a news flash: For over a week, I kissed the ass of the greatest mass murderer of the 20th century, all for the sake of making America and the world more secure. And I’d do it again, because it was the right thing to do, something this Jindal sonofabitch obviously knows nothing about.

That’s right. I traveled around the hard-line communist People’s Republic of China for eight days, making friends and small talk, with Chairman Mao Zedong, the same man who murdered 65 million of his own people. That’s six times greater than the entire population of Cuba, for Christ’s sake!

Starvation, forced labor, executions. Mao did it all, only on a much, much greater scale than Castro could’ve ever dreamed.

Then there are the untold number of American soldiers who died as a result of a Mao-led China’s aid and intervention in the Korean and Vietnam Wars. Hell, the Vietnam conflict was still raging and our GIs were getting killed by Chinese-made armaments when I met with Mao.

This Jindal guy and his ilk are way more of an embarrassment to the party than anything I ever did.

And this Jindal asshole is concerned with legitimizing Fidel’s regime by ending the 54-year-old trade embargo with Cuba, even though doing so would greatly benefit his cash-strapped state economically? Or is he really just a paper tiger who’s concerned about making himself look like a tough guy by shitting on even good ideas that come from the current occupant of the White House?

Look, I know a thing or two about political posturing and attacking one’s enemies merely to score political points. I can tell from a mile away this Jindal character is a phony. He’s all bluster and no gravitas. This little Indian boy is going to get blown away by the first stiff breeze sweeping through the Iowa cornfields. Hell, I’ve got a better shot of winning the 2016 GOP nomination.

You know why I have a better chance? Because I opened up China, for Christ’s sake! Meanwhile, that dullard Jindal can’t even open his mouth without sounding like an ass.

And this guy is supposedly a serious GOP contender for president? What the hell happened to the Republican Party that Ike and I once led? This Jindal guy and his ilk are way more of an embarrassment to the party than anything I ever did.

That’s why he needs to just shut his mouth, get his little man-child ass back to the kiddie table, and let the adults with the big brains figure out how to put the world back together.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Editorial Staff

Editorial Staff
A random collection of overqualified, underachieving smartasses.

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