SAFETY FIRST: How to Spot Sex Offenders During Halloween

With Halloween upon us, law enforcement agencies are warning sex offenders to stay inside and reminding them that they aren’t allowed to wear costumes, give out candy, or have a porch light on.

However, there simply aren’t enough East Baton Rouge Parish sheriff’s deputies to ensure the nearly 1,000 known perverts in the parish are not joining in the Halloween fun.

Offers candy and says, “You have to tell me if you’re a cop, right?”

That’s why, as a public safety message, we’re offering this list of dead giveaways to spot sexual deviants trying to mingle with your little ghouls and goblins this All Hallows Eve.

  • Ghost costume is a sheet with a hole cut out for penis.
  • Instead of candy, gives out sample-size bottles of K-Y.
  • Asks kids to “smell this handkerchief.”
  • free-candy-vanTells kids, “Come get your candy in my windowless van.”
  • Dressed as “Sexy Jerry Sandusky.”
  • Sits in a lawn chair with murky bowl in lap, inviting kids to “bob for carrots.”
  • Makes kids take the candy out of their mouths.
  • Inadvertently says, “Dick or treat.”
  • Offers candy and says, “You have to tell me if you’re a cop, right?”
  • Kid-licking-blowpopHands out nothing but blow pops.
  • Has smeared clown makeup on front of his pants.
  • Whenever an attractive woman in a sexy costume goes by, frowns and says, “Aren’t you a little old for Halloween?”
  • Offers kids a chance to relax from trick-or-treating with wine coolers inside.
  • Tells kids to reach for candy deep down in his pockets.
  • Costume consists of a sign around neck that says, “I’m a giant perv.”RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Editorial Staff

Editorial Staff
A random collection of overqualified, underachieving smartasses.

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