Bucs’ Dashon Goldson on Suspension: “I Can’t Wait to Come Back and Paralyze a Mutha Fucker!”

Dashon-Goldson
Suspended Buccaneer safety Dashon Goldson wants to crush a vertebra when he returns to play.

In response to being suspended one game by the NFL without pay for his illegal helmet-to-helmet hit on New Orleans Saints running back Darren Sproles on Sunday, Tampa Bay safety Dashon Goldson indicated he’s anxious to inflict permanent injury upon his return to the gridiron in Week Four when the Buccaneers host the Cardinals.

The league suspended Goldson for his hit on the defenseless Sproles primarily because this is his fifth such unnecessary-roughness violation since 2011.

“I’m going to make Jack Tatum look like a total pussy.”

Despite the fact he’ll miss out on the Bucs’ game this Sunday against the New England Patriots and the accompanying $264,705 game check, a defiant Goldson said he’s not about to let the NFL’s crackdown on dangerous hits to the head and neck area force him to change his style of play. In fact, the seven-year vet from the University of Washington hopes to put someone in a wheelchair by the end of the month.

“I can’t wait to come back and paralyze a mutha fucker!” Goldson told The Tampa Tribune. “I’m going to make Jack Tatum look like a total pussy,” he said, referring to the late Oakland Raider defensive back who was notorious for dishing out punishing blows, including one in 1978 that left New England receiver Darryl Stingley a quadriplegic until his death in 2007.

Dashon-Goldson-Greg-Schiano
Tampa Bay head coach Greg Schiano implores Dashon Goldson to end someone’s career.

“Next time I hit the field, I want to sever a spinal cord!” Goldson added. “I don’t care if it’s a player, a ref, or a fan. I just want permanently disable somebody!”

Tampa Bay head coach Greg Schiano commented that while the Bucs will miss Goldson’s presence Sunday against the Patriots, he appreciates the two-time Pro Bowler’s style of play and refusal to cease trying to debilitate opposing players.

“I love the fact that Dashon doesn’t let flags, fines, or suspensions deter him from playing physical,” Schiano said. “I wish all my guys had his attitude. I don’t care if the entire team gets suspended and we have to forfeit the rest of the season, I want us to physically punish our opponents, even if it means some of them will never walk again.”

EDITOR’S NOTE: On Wednesday, the NFL overturned Goldson’s suspension and reduced his punishment to a $100,000 fine, which means he won’t have to wait until Week Four to paralyze a mutha fucker.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Tony Swartz

Tony Swartz
Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

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