BACS Honorable Mention: Luis Briones

Blood-Alcohol-Championship-SeriesLuis BrionesA man from the Land of Enchantment apparently was trying to live up to New Mexico’s nickname by reportedly having sex with a woman while allegedly driving drunk Monday night.

According to The Albuquerque Journal, police found 25-year-old Luis Briones wearing only one shoe and a pair of inside-out shorts after he crashed his Ford Explorer while having intercourse with his female passenger.

Police said he tried to hide from responding officers in a cactus, which means he wasn’t the only one with a stiff prick.

Police said he tried to hide from responding officers in a cactus, which means he wasn’t the only one with a stiff prick.

Briones’ naked female passenger was found outside the SUV with cuts to her head and face after being ejected, thus giving new meaning to the term “wrecking that pussy.”

Authorities also allege the boozy boner tried to drive away from the scene while his highway honey lay helplessly on the ground.

What an inconsiderate pig. Not only did Briones have a premature ejection, but he didn’t even want to stick around to cuddle.

However, before Briones could jet like the “love ’em and leave ’em lying on the side of the road” dog he obviously is, a witness grabbed his keys from the ignition. So not only was his sex partner totally turned off, but so was his SUV.

Briones was charged with aggravated DWI, reckless driving, and evading police.

Maybe someone in jail was willing and able to finish what Briones’ passenger couldn’t.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

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