Bobby and Bozie. Even their names are similar.

Jindal Calls BR Elephant Moving to D.C. His “Power Animal,” “Spiritual Companion”

Bobby and Bozie. Even their names are similar.
Bobby and Bozie. Even their names are similar.

Gov. Bobby Jindal claims that Bozie, the Asian elephant set to move from Baton Rouge to Washington, D.C., is a living totem guiding his political future.

Jindal’s remarks came this weekend following The Advocate’s report about the 37-year-old pachyderm’s pending relocation to the National Zoo, thus leaving BREC’s Baton Rouge Zoo without an elephant for the first time since 1970.

“Now that we are united, she will protect and guide me to Washington and the presidency.”

“Bozie is my power animal,” Jindal told reporters upon returning from the NRA convention in Houston. “Her essence came to me last night, and she said she has chosen me as her spiritual companion. Now that we are united, she will protect and guide me to Washington and the presidency.”

Jindal stated Bozie selected him after her previous companion, Judy, the Baton Rouge Zoo’s only other elephant, died in March.

“Bozie chose to be my power animal since we have so much in common,” Jindal added. “I’m a 41-year-old Indian-American Republican with a not-so-secret desire to relocate to D.C. She’s 37, she symbolizes my political party, and she’s from Sri Lanka, which is practically part of India. Our synchronicity is undeniable!”

When asked how a devout Catholic such as himself could avow such Native American shamanistic beliefs, Jindal replied, “Hey, I’m an Indian.”RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Tony Swartz

Tony Swartz
Tony is proof that you can write Peabody-worthy news without ever darkening the halls of journalism school.

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