BACS Honorable Mention: Reese Witherspoon

Blood-Alcohol-Championship-SeriesTo qualify for a BACS honorable mention, one must generally be arrested for drunk driving. However, in this case, we’ll waive that unwritten requirement in the interest of fairness to America’s (former) sweetheart, Reese Witherspoon.

reese-witherspoon-mug-shot
Reese Witherspoon won an Oscar for her performance in Walk the Line. Her husband was arrested for DUI because he couldn’t.

According to Variety, the 37-year-old actress was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct early Friday morning in Atlanta, where’s she’s filming the movie The Good Lie, after repeatedly disobeying instructions from her husband’s arresting officer.

The account states Witherspoon’s hubby and agent James Toth was pulled over just past midnight under suspicion of driving while intoxicated after reportedly weaving across a double line on one of the ATL’s umpteen thousand Peachtree Streets.

[pullquote]Even if the cop did know who she is and watched every one of her movies at least 10 times, she still deserved to go to jail for copping an attitude while riding in a Ford Focus.[/pullquote]

Toth looked disheveled and had a smell of alcohol on his breath, police said, so they administered a field sobriety test in the Walgreens parking lot Toth had pulled into.

Apparently, Witherspoon did not care for the methodical pace at which the officer was conducting the test. The star of Sweet Home Alabama, Legally Blonde, and Walk the Line became increasingly agitated while sitting in the couple’s silver 2013 Ford Focus.

After being told to stay in that super bitchin’ ride for her own safety, the officer reported Witherspoon “began to hang out the window and say that she did not believe that I was a real police officer.” Perhaps she’s been in Hollywood too long and thinks everyone else is just playing a part opposite her.

James Toth handles his liquor as well as he handles his wife/client.
James Toth handles his liquor as well as he handles his wife/client.

The arresting officer responded by telling “Mrs. Witherspoon to sit on her butt and be quiet,” just like any Southern gentleman would do in that situation.

Despite telling an officer that he had only one drink hours earlier, a Breathalyzer test administered on the scene revealed Toth had a blood-alcohol level of 0.139, close to double the legal limit for driving. That must have been one big-ass drink.

Once the 41-year-old Toth was placed under arrest for drunk driving, his Academy Award-winning wife exited their supercool whip and was immediately instructed to get back in the car. The report states Witherspoon “stated that she was a ‘US citizen’ and that she was allowed to ‘stand on American ground.'”

Even though she was ostensibly wasted just as much as (if not more than) her husband, Witherspoon expressed what all grade-school civics students know: Every American citizen has a right to stand wherever the hell she wants as long as it’s in America. Whether it’s someone else’s private property, a toxic waste dump, or Area 51, all American citizens have a constitutional right to stand wherever the red, white and blue flies overhead.

She apparently also thinks an Oscar can get your spouse out of a DUI, too.

“Do you know my name?” Witherspoon asked the officer.

There’s no mention in the report if Witherspoon whipped out her smartphone to show the officer her imdb profile.

There’s no mention in the report whether he tried looking her up on imdb.com on the laptop in his police cruiser.

When the officer replied that he didn’t need her name at that time, Witherspoon told him, “You’re about to find out who I am.” Again, there’s no mention in the report if Witherspoon whipped out her smartphone to show the officer her imdb profile.

When she informed the officer that he was “going to be on national news,” he in turn “advised Mrs. Witherspoon that was fine.”

Reese Witherspoon and James Toth in happier, legally blonder, more sober times.
Reese Witherspoon and James Toth in happier, (legally) blonder, more sober times.

You know, even if the cop did know who she is and watched every one of her movies at least 10 times, she still deserved to go to jail for copping an attitude while riding in a Ford Focus.

Both Toth and Witherspoon were handcuffed and briefly jailed. They were released on bond at around 3:30 a.m.

The couple has been married since March 2011. In September, they had a son named Tennessee James Toth, possibly named after the type of whiskey that led to his conception.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

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