MARCH MADNESS: News vs. Booze

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It’s that time of year when workplace productivity plummets because everyone is too damn busy either filling out their tournament brackets or watching college basketball. It’s that magical season when people who don’t follow the sport suddenly become experts in RPI rankings.

And since so many people are about to be stricken with bracketitis, we figured we’d join the fray with our own version of March Madness, one we felt most readers of The Red Shtick could really sink their teeth – or at least their livers – into.

So without further ado, we introduce …

“March Madness: News vs. Booze,” a single-elimination tournament wherein the top 16 local TV newscasters (chosen and seeded by our less-than-esteemed committee) face off for the chance to go against the most popular form of alcohol.

Most of us have a favorite news anchor or reporter, as well as a favorite drink to imbibe while watching that person tell us how f–ked up the world is.

Think of it as their chance for “One Shining Moment” … if a drunken Luther Vandross had recorded the song while watching the evening news.

So why exactly are we pitting local newscasters against various types of alcohol? Mainly because most of us have a favorite news anchor or reporter, as well as a favorite drink to imbibe while watching that person tell us how f–ked up the world is. Or in other words, one group tells us what’s going on, while the other helps us cope with it.

We want to see who our readers will vote as champion of each division, and then have those two finalists square off for an ultimate champion of News vs. Booze!

So get ready to vote! Every weekday for the next three weeks, there will be a matchup in each division. You, our gentle readers, will have to a chance to vote … as often as you like. This IS Louisiana, after all.

The tournament kicks off Monday, March 18 with the 1 vs. 16 matchups.

And remember, since there is alcohol involved with this competition, please don’t involve us in any sort of wagering. We don’t need state Alcohol and Tobacco Control Commissioner Troy Hebert on our ass.RedShtick-Top-ColumnStop

About Editorial Staff

A random collection of overqualified, underachieving smartasses.

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